FOMO & Is The Grass Really Greener On The Other Side?

The grass is greener on the other side. What a bunch of crap! The grass is greener where you water it.

For most of my life, I suffered from FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) & the grass is greener on the other side complex (or GIGOTOS as I like to call it).

When I was working in Hollywood Nightlife I always thought I should be doing something else even though I was having fun, building career capital & making great money.

In the first couple of years at Oh My Green I had plenty of thoughts of “This is too hard. There is too much stress & anxiety. Life would be better at another company.”

Fortunately, over the last few years, I’ve learned from serious in-depth life study, several mental/physical concepts, techniques habits & transformative processes that have empowered me to embrace my actual life, right here, right now, in the present.

These formative practices include daily meditation, getting good sleep, practicing stoicism, developing grit & anti-fragility, Vision Quests & Physical Quests (Gran Fondo, Spartan Beast), yoga, participating in transformational workshops & coaching (Landmark, Couples Coaching), & reading some great books & blogs as well listening to podcasts that have alchemized the way I think about work, money, relationships & life in general.

Sticking around at Oh My Green and using the constant challenges to forge myself anew again and again has been one of the best decisions & practices of my life. The obstacle is the way. And the challenges don’t get easier or go away. Just like you don’t get rid of your problems. You just get better problems (aka opportunities) to work on that will push & empower you to the next level of your life.

The only thing you are missing out on when you are focused on something that is out there is your own wild & wonderful life.

So if you think the grass is greener on the other side & are experiencing FOMO... WAKE THE FUCK UP!

Your life is happening right now in this very moment.

Everything you need to live a life worth living for is contained within you. The work you are doing, the relationship you are in, the experiences/situations you are in & the body you inhabit are the very things that you can use to create a life truly worth living for.

Your life is the biggest gift you will ever be given and to tap into it you need to focus on the present. Realize the future, the past, and some other person, place or thing outside of yourself and your life is an illusion meant to distract you from receiving the gift of the present. There is a very important reason it’s called the PRESENT—it is the gift of all gifts!

Ignore the noise & take 100% responsibility for all aspects of your life & take massive action. By doing this you will realize just how much personal power you have & just how awesome your life is.

To reiterate, the key is taking RESPONSIBILITY & ACTION now. For everything in your life. Not some day in the future.

We all have problems. Empowered individuals mine the fuck out of their problems & turn them into golden opportunities that transform their lives for the better. They do this each day and each week, especially during the messy & chaotic times.

So, I say fuck that other grass & fuck FOMO. I’m gonna keep watering this grass right here & with just a little bit of self-awareness know that I can harness the power of JOMO — the Joy Of Missing Out on shit that isn’t happening in my life right here, right now. I’m embracing my PRESENT!

5 powerful ways to cultivate JOMO, avoid FOMO & negate the grass is greener on the other side Mentality:

In addition to the more in-depth methods I mentioned above here are 4 strategies you can begin implementing in your life today to build a better more satisfying & authentic life. 

1. Develop a personal mission: when you are living on purpose and are consciously aware that you are living on purpose you actually appreciate exactly where you are at and FOMO and GIGOTOS have nothing on you. [some resources listed in this article for developing a personal mission]

2. Understand & activate the 3 Related Principles of Continuous Life Optimization: When you focus on optimizing these three areas—people, environment, consumption—it’s unlikely you will succumb to FOMO or grass is greener on the other side.

3. Practice Negative Visualization: This is a great mental technique to bring massive joy to just about any situation in your life. I practice it daily.  [quick tutorial on this in this Instagram Post]

4. Meditate: I’ve been doing Transcendental Meditation (TM) for over 4 years without missing a single day of meditation. It’s a powerful part of keeping my Inner Citadel well fortified. There are hundreds if not thousands of types of meditation practices. Headspace is a great place to start (download the app & start today). The point is to find one that works for you and keep at it. It is not an overnight fix. It’s slow, but the positive effects are deep, pervasive & long last-lasting.

5. Take responsibility & action for EVERYTHING in your life: It’s amazing how much can be solved by taking responsibility & taking action. It cures fear, anxiety, stagnation & creates movement & new life in your life.

There are plenty of other strategies to cultivate JOMO, avoid FOMO & negate the grass is greener on the other side mentality. At the core of it all is MINDSET & HABITS—build these up and you’ll be happily seated in your powerful Inner Citadel that has everything you need to live a life worth living for.

Feel free to share your related tips & strategies in the comments or reach out to me on one of my social media platforms to share.

Wishing you all a life full of Joy in the Present!

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END NOTE: This was originally an Instagram Post that I updated & slightly expanded so that it could be more useful instead of just inspiring. I use my Instagram like a microblog, but oftentimes find that I need more characters/words than allowed to fully flesh out an empowering piece of content.

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Always more Life Empowering posts & stories on my Instagram:

💪🏼🌱🥳 It’s my 40th birthday & I went Raw Vegan! ⏩ Swipe to see what I ate! Ok, I’m not truly a Raw Vegan, just Vegan for over 2-years now! Woohoo! I had the good fortune to savor a lovely Raw Vegan Birthday Meal at @rawlovetulum! I thoroughly enjoyed the following: 1. Black Bean Burger 2. Maki Roll 3. Living Pizza (personal fav) 4. Coconut Curry Feeling incredibly grateful for my 30s — all the special people, trials, tribulations, growth & success. The tough parts, the beautiful parts, and everything in between! All my experiences up until now have helped to shape the man I am today & the ever-evolving man I am becoming with each new day. Looking back on my life experiences & the people in it with the deepest of Gratitude 🙏🏼, anchoring myself in the Divine Beauty of the PRESENT 😇🎁 & looking forward to the Epic Adventure of my 40s! 🤘🏼😅🤘🏼 YEEHAWWW!!! Feeling nothing but Raw Love! 🙌🏼💗🐲 #veganbirthday #rawvegan #veganfitness #vegan #veganmuscle #veganfood #veganbodybuilding #tulum #fitvegan

I am NOT on the Carnivore diet. But I am definitely on the Greens. While on holiday vacation I had a few people come up to me at the gym in Huntington Beach & ask if the reason I am so fit is because I eat a lot of meat & am on the carnivore diet. The first time this happened I told the guy I was Vegan & he looked at me with a confused look like I was speaking another language. I went on to tell him that I only eat plants (no animal products) & his confusion still continued… He went on to tell me that he’s been seeing a lot of super muscular people online toting the Carnivore Diet as the key to their fitness. I went on to explain that unfortunately a lot of these people pushing the meat diet are likely taking some serious steroids to achieve their physical appearance. Plus, meat & dairy consumption along w/ steroids is going to cost them in the long-run in terms of longevity & healthspan—meaning how healthy they will be during their lifespan. Real scientific studies show us that the healthiest longest living people eat a predominantly whole food plant-based diet & that many diseases are either caused by and/or exacerbated by the consumption of meat & dairy. Fortunately, now there are tons of people showing us that not only can you have a science-backed Vegan diet that promotes optimal healthspan & longevity working in your favor but you can also be super muscular & jacked eating & living this way. I’m just one example that you can be a super fit ~40yo 100% Natural Vegan Bodybuilder with a wife & full-time professional career in tech. You don’t even need to be a full time athlete or fitness influencer or compete in bodybuilding shows (I never have). All you need to be super fit, muscular & healthy AF is the right mindset, diet, lifestyle & habits. 👉🏼The new @vedgenutrition Organic Greens drops today! It’s a key part of my daily fitness wellbeing strategy to incorporate 15 Superfoods for optimal energy, immunity, digestion & healthspan! And it tastes so good! 💪🏼🌱Code DRAGON to save 🐲 #vegan #veganbodybuilding #carnivore #carnivorediet #veganfitness #greensmoothie #greens

🤔 I’m curious what holiday traditions healthy & fit people incorporate into their lives? As a newly married man, I’ve been thinking a lot about what kind of family holiday traditions we want to design into the fabric of our lives. Here’s what we did for Thanksgiving Weekend: The Phoenix cooked up a truly Divine Vegan Spread that included Shepard’s Pie, Bacon Wrapped Dates & freshly made cranberry sauce. We capped it off with some Plant-Based @benandjerrys on top of a pumpkin brownie. My day started with my regular morning practice of meditation, journaling, tracking/planning, goals/visualization, creativity, affirmations, reading & an early morning workout (leg day) at the gym. It was inspiring to be at a gym that was actually quite busy on Thanksgiving. Love witnessing others living a Fitness Lifestyle! Throughout the day I connected with my Mom, Dad, family & friends through the gift of technology. When I came home from the gym the Phoenix was cooking up a storm. We’ve recognized that cooking on the Holiday is usually the highest joy for the Phoenix. The Dragon is a lucky beneficiary of this. I drew myself an Epsom Salt Bath & soaked while the Phoenix finished cooking. Been doubling down on my recovery these days. [Key if you train frequently & want to stay in top shape at ~40.] I fasted until our first meal around 1pm. This is pretty typical for me as I intermittent fast most days for 80-90% of the year. [Simple strategy to avoid overeating at a planned holiday meal.] The Phoenix delivered a thoughtful grace before we dug in. Good convo & delicious food were had. After our first meal, the Phoenix read in bed while the Dragon took an epic 2-hour nap by her side. Upon arising we watched a fun movie (Red Notice) then had more food & dessert. Then it was off to bed nice & early (typical for Dragon since I awake very early). Later that weekend we took a day trip adventure to Santa Cruz. For me, it was a perfectly healthy, fit, & fun celebration! #vegan #veganthanksgiving #veganholiday

What happens when Vegan Athletes get together? They go do a @Spartan Obstacle Course Race together! And before the race, they dry-scoop @vedgenutrition Pre-Workout & Nitro Pump because that is what Fit Vegan Savages do! Such an epic time with @nimai_delgado @alexanderbvck @luckiesigouin running through the mountains of Castaic & tackling obstacles together! It was a crystal clear blue sunny day & Gaia was regal AF in all her magnificent! Afterward, we hit up the @veganexchangela (my first time) to refuel & demolish some delicious vegan food! I had the Pitmaster from @leaf_over_beef which included an @impossible_foods patty, Smoked BBQ Pulled Pork, Mac & Cheese, Cabbage, Pickles all on a Pretzel Bun. So good! We even ran into @leo_fit_life, another Vedge Athlete, who helps put on the Vegan Exchange. The Vedge Athletes are always up to life-enhancing endeavors! Good times w/ good friends, lots of laughs, fitness, some grit & blood, nature time, deep convo & delicious food were all par for the course. All in all, it was a super Epic Vegan Adventure! This is the kind of stuff that lifelong cherished memories are made of! Next up for the Vedge Team: maybe a massive 50+ mile cycling event or a Vision Quest! YEEHAW!! 🤘🏼🐲🤘🏼 #vegan #veganfitness #spartan #veganfood #veganlifestyle

👉🏼What do you do when you get together with your Vegan Friends? During my SoCal road trip last month I got to meet up w/ one of my favorite people @nimai_delgado & spend the day doing what Fit Vegans do when they get together. We started our man-date at @goldsgym Venice (of course) fueled by the Holy Trinity aka the @vedgenutrition Pre/Pump/Creatine+ stack to get in a solid back & biceps workout. While at the gym we ran into Simon Hill @plant_proof which was super fun for me as a longtime listener & fan of the good work he does. After that, it was back to Nimai’s crib to refuel w/ Vedge Plant Pro & have deep talks about the future of the Vedge Community—very exciting stuff to come! Then it was time to hit the beach on skates/blades & soak up that solar ocean energy! On our way back we ran into @luckiesigouin! Seriously gotta love the Vegan Mecca that Venice seems to be! Throughout the entire day, Nimai & I spent a lot of time talking about many important life areas like career/calling, goals, dreams & aspirations, personal development, books, fitness, work/life balance, relationships, etc. Nimai & I always seem to go super deep whenever we connect, but I think that’s pretty typical of both of us! 🤓 After our Venice & Santa Monica roll, I got to try out Vedge’s forthcoming Organic Greens powder & was super impressed with the taste, consistency, & delicious flavor. Can’t wait for that to get released! Somehow we did not make it to a Vegan lunch spot, but I was riding high on good energy/synergy so I hardly noticed! 😅 Ultimately, we had an empowering Vegan Man-Date full of fitness, nature time, deep talks, life/goals ideation/strategy, & more all fueled by plant power! 💪🏼🌱 Next up we're doing a Vedge Team @spartan Sprint! ⚔️ This is what an awesome Vegan Lifestyle worth living looks like for me! YEEHAW!! 🤘🏼🐲🤘🏼 #vegan #veganfitness #veganbodybuilding #veganlifestyle

When I leveled up my Life & went 99% Vegan at the beginning of 2020 there was one aspect of my new lifestyle that wasn’t quite in line—my sports supplements. Specifically, my pre-workout stack. For months I tried a bunch of different Vegan Pre-Workout formulas from various companies but none of them hit like the non-vegan pre-workout I was taking so I kept going back it. This left me very conflicted. I even asked my wife if I could publicly say that I was Vegan if I was knowingly taking a supplement that was not 100% Vegan. Her response was “no.” And in my heart I knew she was right because that would be inauthentic. Then something amazing happened towards the end of 2020. I had recently become a Vedge Elite Athlete & to my great excitement they released a 100% Vegan Pre-Workout! And guess what…? It hit HARD! 👊🏼 It got me super amped to crush my workouts & I was regularly hitting new PRs! 📈 And there’s more! There was no crash afterwards and it tasted so good! Plus you can stack it with Nitro Pump which is the non-stimulant version of the Pre-Workout for a truly incredible pump! 💪🏼 And the best part for me? I finally got to say that I was 100% Vegan & feel super good about it! 🌱😇 The gains & newfound energy/pump have been a close second best part! 😅 I’ve been battleground testing the Vedge Pre-Workout & Nitro Pump for the last year with every single workout I do & I can honestly say that it’s the best pre-workout stack available—whether or not you are Vegan. Happy to report I’m in the best shape of my life too! It has science-backed dosing of high quality organic ingredients from trusted sourcing. This is key because there is so much fluff & BS in most supplements. Most products on the market have a sprinkle of an ingredient & that will have zero effect. So, if you’re looking to take your workouts & fitness to the next level with a product that you can trust get yourself the @vedgenutrition Pre-Workout / Nitro Pump stack & light yourself on FIRE!! 🔥 👉🏼Use code DRAGON at checkout to save! And to support your favorite Life Alchemist! 🙏🏼💗🐲 ➖➖➖ #vegan #veganfitness #calisthenics #preworkout #gymnasticsrings Title PC: @isaacgautschi

Having work that makes us come ALIVE is a must for truly living a life worth living for. The longer I live the more I’ve learned what type of work lights me on fire & what type of work sucks away my life force. Over the years & decades, it’s mostly been a trial & error process of discovering the type of work that sparks me. And while that process has worked, I wonder how much time I could have saved from toiling away at work that did not light me up. I also wonder how many other people spend years if not decades or lifetimes doing work that doesn’t really make them feel like they’re doing what they were meant to do. So, when I discovered that @jonathanfields has spent the last several years rigorously developing a body of work, framework & test that allows one to identify the type of work that makes us truly shine (inwardly & outwardly) I immediately dived into his work he has compiled & distilled in his new best-selling book “SPARKED: Discover Your Unique Imprint for Work that Makes you Come Alive!” Through Jonathan’s work, I discovered my primary & secondary Work Archetype, or what he calls one’s Sparketype, and it was so empowering that I cried (true story). It was like finally being able to name something that I could sense subconsciously just below the surface, but was always just out of my conscious grasp. Identifying, naming & deeply understanding my Sparketype felt like a homecoming. Like a return to my True Self. And when I looked back on all my years of work it was always when I was doing the work of my primary Sparketype that I felt most alive & that I was the most successful! Through very good fortune I will be sitting down with Jonathan Fields for a Live Webinar to share his Sparketype work with others and it will be FREE to all who attend thanks to my company @getgarten. I’m so excited to share this with more people because what the world needs right now is more people who have come alive! 🗓 The Free Webinar will take place this Thursday 10/14 at 12pm PST. 👉🏼 Space is Limited & Registration is Required so please signup at Garten.co or through the link in my bio. Hope to see you there! 🙏🏼💗🐉 #work #worklife

First time trying Vegan African American Fusion! Who else has tried it? The Phoenix Wife @carlylynwise surprised me this weekend with a Day Trip to Santa Cruz! We’re in the process of figuring out where we want to buy a home so we’ve been exploring different areas. We donned our hiking shoes & explored some of the neighborhoods as well as the beach while getting in our steps. Urban hiking in new areas is always a great way to spend the day in my Life Alchemist opinion. It’s an awesome way to get in movement, expand your mind, add novelty, fantasize about living in a new place, get into meaningful deep conversations w/ another & so much more! Apparently, there was an Ironman going on while we were there so that added to the fun & excitement! We finished up the urban hike w/ a Vegan Lunch at @veg_ontheedge! We enjoyed the Èfo O L’Ogede (Plantain Curry), the Śuyà Burger made w/ a @beyondmeat patty, & Cassava Fries. It was a super delicious & hearty meal that expanded our tastebuds’ horizons! 🙏🏼❤️‍🔥🐉 P.S. If you have any recommendations for great places to live w/ good year-round weather that support a holistic wellbeing & fitness lifestyle w/ good-to-decent vegan options I'd love to hear about it in the comments! Extra points if the cost of living is reasonable! ➖➖➖ #daytrip #santacruz #urbanhiking #veganfood #veganafricanfood #vegancouple #veganlifestyle #lifealchemist

Is rollerblading cool again? As a kid there were a few summers where I probably rollerbladed almost every single day. I loved it so much that I would spend entire days rollerblading all over town. One of my teachers still tells the tale of how I would rollerblade down Main Street like I owned the place. To this day my childhood rollerblading adventures hold a special place in my heart & I have scar that will never let me forget. For whatever reason rollerblading somehow became uncool by the time I entered high school & like most teenagers who are overly concerned about what others think I let my childhood blading joy whither & die. Sometime around 2010 this wildfire of a woman invited me to go rollerblading. At first, I resisted thinking & saying it wasn’t cool anymore. She persisted. Eventually I gave in, bought a pair of blades & got back out there with her. That childhood magic I thought had died years ago reignited within moments of the first few rollerblade strides I took. A huge goofy grin came over my face. A lightness appeared in my body & I began to flow again. It truly felt magical. Like dancing in space. Because of my wife @carlylynwise I’ve been rollerblading for the last decade plus & I stopped caring whether it was considered cool or not. It brings me massive joy. It brings out my inner child. It empowers my mind, body & spirit to free flow. And that is all that really matters. For our wedding we captured some of the Rollerblading Magic back in my hometown & I’d like to think we look cool AF! 🤘🏼❤️‍🔥🐉 ➖➖➖ PC: @brittanybrenske Frames: @endlessblading Boots: @frskates @intuitionliners @powerslidebrand #rollerblading #inlineskating #rollerblade #rollerblades

Labor Day 7-years ago would be the last time I had alcohol… Although at the time I didn’t know it. After getting way too drunk in Half Moon Bay with my then girlfriend (now wife) I spent the car-ride home throwing up out the side of the car. I was a fuckin’ mess. The next day I felt like shit. No surprise. @carlylynwise informed me that she was going to consciously take a month off from drinking & she asked me if I’d like to join her. In my misery I glumly agreed to join her. This was the first time since I had started drinking at the age of 20 that I consciously decide to take a break. The first month went well. So well in fact that I asked my partner if we could do a second month. The second month felt good too & I was starting to notice that my mood swings had began to really level out. I was no longer waking up feeling depressed & emotional for no identifiable reason. In fact, I was feeling so much better all-around than I had in years. Something I never could have even noticed before because I had never gone more than a week or two without drinking in the last 12 years. So naturally, at the end of month 2 of sobriety I proposed to my partner that we do a 3rd month. Like the trailblazer she is she responded with “how about we try being #sober for 1-year.” I was like “Whoa now! A whole year?! I’m going to have to think about that.” I said I’d continue to be sober while I mulled it over. I came to the conclusion that since I had spent 12-years drinking, often excessively, especially while working in Hollywood Nightlife, that I could take 1-year & dedicate it to being sober. I figured it would be good for my body & mind. So, about a week after her 1-year of sobriety proposal I accepted & we embarked on the #soberlife journey together. 7-years later we’re still going strong, completely sober from all drugs & alcohol & it has been one of the best life-decisions we’ve ever made. We found ourselves, each other, our success, our happiness, our health, & so much more! I am forever grateful to my Wife for paving the way for us. 🙏🏼🤍🐉 ➖➖➖ PC1: @avnicreates PC2/3: @saraknobelphoto Suit: @ezracayman #sobriety #sobercouple #soberliving

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